On Nuts

In golf we have a saying, “You gotta putt to win the nut.” Now, I’m not entirely sure where that expression comes from, because I’ve never won any kind of nut golfing. But if I were to win some nuts, I’d prefer it to be pistachios, which are the Cadillac of nuts. Pecans are a close second - they’re maybe the Lincoln of nuts. Easily in last place are peanuts, which are a favorite of baseball fans because they’re what could be described kindly as, “of limited taste.”

And now, some nut-based humor.

What sound do nuts make when they sneeze? Cashew.

Which nut is the angriest? Pissed-achio.

Did you hear about the nut that got a boob-job? She became a chestnut.

- Martin

Me trying to think of more nut related jokes.